Cast away with irritating people.

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When I saw the movie Cast away, i felt bad. Felt bad because i had similar kind of Idea for a film long time back. But unlike in the movie, I was not married. No, i didnt have a job either.

That thought could have been, possibly, because, when things went out of hand (as usual) i wanted to resort to a place no one can find me. No internet, no phone, no electricity. Where i could be un reached, where i could be alone doing nothing but eating and sleeping. May be, i can also do some cave art when bored.

As years went by, I started adding characters to my fantasy. What if i got stuck with a damsel in distress? What If i got stuck with a super rich guy and then save him from a wild shark/crocodile/bear/tiger/giant sea monster and in favour he gives me half(or may be three fourth) his wealth as we return? (Of course, i will get laid with the damsel in distress !!)

But then, i could not add any more characters. It seems these are the only tow people i want to be with when I am cast away on this deserted island where no one can reach to. No one else, seem to fit into the scene. A hard rock band wont do, they are useless without distortion, for which electricity is not available.  Teenagers/kids/old people stay away, I dont want to take care of anybody.

But what if, i got people who I love to hate? If that is the fate, I will see that i make life horrible for them - not the other way round - like , if I got stuck with menaka Gandhi, I would sbe eating fish and rabbit aroud her. And if i got stuck with  Anna Hazare, i would be drinking rum and whiskey(whichever is available) all the time, around him. And If, it is the stupid teenager, all I have to do is throw away the iphone/tablet into the water, and he or she is doomed for life.

How can somebody spoil my day?
It is too easy i guess. The very sight of people I hate spoils all my day.

Sigh.
I think i need that damsel and the lonely island. (With life time supply of whiskey/rum and cigarettes and cannabis.)

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getting estranged

::

Yet again.

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Travel partner

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Strange, but i want a travel partner.
Just to travel with.

Have no idea where to get one.
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Of Anna, lokpal and shit.

::

Thats it. He pulled the plug in this.

Anna Hazare has been in the news for long now. I wont want to go into details, but

Who the F*** does he think he is?

Giving ultimatum to the elected government. ?? What right does he have for that? Just because he has some followers, does that mean that he can dictate stuff to government, and threat?

As if, the bill is going the change India to Paradise. No one knows about the bill, every freaking A**hole thinks every freaking thing he does is right.

Why do we need a government then? We can all very well ask him to rule the state.

Sadly, people are so blind - to blame everything on government. Government did not come from thin air, they are just a reflection of what we all are.

If the government need to change, WE all have to change.

To - All those assholes who support him, fast with him and shit with him - if all of you, who claims to be a "HUGE" portion of Indian population, change yourself, take pledge NEVER to give bribe, obey traffic rules, DO not litter, support indian products - you will achieve what you claims you want to achieve.

But how can you? You people have no idea or individuality, that you are like slaves, who need someone to tell you what you are to do.

To The media who projects him - if you think Anna is following Gandhian Principles, you are wrong. I am not a Gandhian, but its very easy to see he has nothing to Do with the principles of that great man.

All he did in the last few months is, to threaten the government, Campaign against the congress (I am in no way a congress supporter) and speak non sense.

I know I got carried away, but this guy is irritating- very irritating.
::

Your time, your life

::
never give your time to people
if you are not sure that you will get it back from them.

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The set of chemicals theory.

::

this post reminded me of one of my old theories - the set of chemicals theory which can define human beings.

So, if you split parts of human being, to its minutest form, we can conclude that we are, nothing but a set of chemicals combined together. And we do not 'think' and make decisions, the chemicals re arrange according to external stimuli, the net result of it, is what we decipher as 'thinking'.

No one usually agrees to me in this, but  wtf. I strongly believes in it, cause It is my own. :P

its just like the river. as the river flows, it do a lot of things. it filters on its own, and do something related to external stimuli - like heat, excess water etc. Human beings, or any other 'living' being as we call it, are just like that, but with more complex processes.

Blame it on the neuro transmitters and motor neurons. Its all their fault.

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out of place.

::
As usual, i am in the wrong place once again.
I should not have spent that money on flight.

Wrong decisions. all the time.

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Getting disconnected.

::
Its been a long time since i removed myself from electronic networking, in the form of Facebook and Orkut. Its been long, very long, in fact. I have removed all traces of my personal life, except this blog.

I am not surprised that I am missing the network. I never believed in networks, and I dont think i will ever. Looking back, and to a limit, looking forward, I have no idea what I am into.

Every day that passes by gets me more disconnected from the people I know. From the people I liked very much, to the people I hated. I am alien to the electronic ways of telling people I care.

If only I followed the unwritten rules that people around follow. If only I knew what I want from my life. If only I had dreams to fulfill.

The world should end next year.If not, I am screwed big time.

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The finishing point.

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- of a good love is marriage.





(it ends there)

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of mumbai and a long drive

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Its was a long drive. From trivandrum to Bangalore via Nagercoil, the Metallica concert at bangalore, and then the drive to mumbai. about 1800 kilometers, and I am back in Mumbai after about 10 years.
I dont remember much of Mumbai, as I was not Visiting places then. But this time, I was travelling in the local trains, walking the streets, eating things with a 'pav' prefix to it.

I have been in touch with bangalore for long, even delhi and chennai. I loved to be In bangalore, but after revisiting Mumbai, I guess that love for bangalore is a bit lost.

To put it in one word, I am in love with Mumbai. Life is hassle free compared to bangalore. Travel is damn cheap, the local trains help you reach fast, and the auto and taxi people takes the exact fare.

I met the bookshelf girl there, and she made me eat weird stuff with weird names. I just cant remember the name of the stuff that was over the kulfi. I did not like the kulfi stuff, but the road side joints where they sell the samosa and the pav stuff was real good.

I still dont kow, why, after ll these years of travel all over India, I have visited Mumbai the least. I should come back here, spend more time and see what all things I have been missing. At least for now, I am in love with this place.

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being.

::

if you are sure of what you want to do, even if you are wrong about it, i want to be you.
if you can blindly believe in anything, and you can be happy about it, i definitely want to be you.
if people loves you for what you are, I will strive to be you.

or may be i cannot, even if i try.

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Beware of valentines day

::
I know this is not that time of the year. And i am nosupporter of that day, but i dont mind that day either. We have mothers day, fathers day, teachers day, engineers day, doctors day, grand fathers day(It might be there), water day, earth day, forest day, environement day,... so, wtf, let it be and let people do what they want on that day.

but then, i stumbled upon this site, somehow, and i dont know if I am to laugh or not. The whole website is worth a read. I dont feel disturbed, but i do think we all have to do something about unemployment these days.

http://www.hindujagruti.org/activities/campaigns/religious/valentine-day/

I dont intent to disturb any 'communal harmony' with post, - , i am born hindu, but I have to say no one has to go to this end. Practicing what you believe in, and not looking at others, is the best way you can live in peace.
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The rum song

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Late in the lousy evening
I had me fingers shaking
Had me mouth all thirsty

and i missed me girly o 

I went into this roadhouse
And In the rum I sank me
till me hands all be steady
and me see the things all shady

and In walked pretty lady
she wore a black velvetty
she smelled all poison ivy
and she sat so next to me

I bought her all the rum
and I bought her all the whiskey
and I held all her bottom
As I danced to all the songy

and I asked her for her number
and asked her to my shelter
and she smiled her devil smile
and she kissed me lips in style

And morning in me shelter
I have a pretty hangover
I looked around for the lady
for me cant see things so clearly

So I curse the black velvetty
for all me money is all gone
And I curse the black velvetty
for all me rum is all gone

And I curse the black velvetty
For i slept that night alone.

::

oops. I am.

::

Oops. yes.

I am a techie. I am jealous. I am contagious. I am what i am not. I am what you do not want to be. I am a fool to believe. I am negotiable. I am vulnerable. I am a new smoker. I am a new chain smoker. I buy lots of stationery that i do not use. I love cats. I love to drive in the rain. I love to take care of certain people. I am an athiest. I am a poor manager of money. I am in debt. I am spoiled. I am not that fat and i do not want to put up weight. I am a poor singer but i sing a couple of songs well. I play guitar but only selected songs. I love to walk in the rain, nude. I believe in fate. I believe that heaven and hell do not exist. I am hated by most of the people who know me. I drive quite fast when in the mood. I love to have sex with a girl who loves me. I am not a virgin. I say i do not regret my mistakes but deep inside i doubt it. I do not want to have kids. I do not want to have a life partner. I want to travel a lot with a girl who loves my kind of music and loves my way of travel. I am not obsessed with money. I own a black and white phone. I take astro photographs and I am really good in it.  I know to operate most of the telescopes. I do not know how to call on an I phone. I use a car my father bought with his money. I love to make cocktails. I love to listen to Lynrd skynrd and Led zeppelin and Blue oyster cult. I love to drive with a girl i like and hold her hands when I drive. I like very few guys who I know. I am getting old. The best kiss I ever had was in my car. I have not felt peace of mind in the last 15 years. I started smoking cigarettes only a couple of months back. I have a dirty mind. I am very selfish.   I am a sadist sometimes. I am jealous of guys who look better than me. I am jealous of girls who are taller than me and who can drive a car better than me. I am not confident in riding a geared motor cycle. I draw faces of the satan very well. Iam really scared of getting any kind of injection. I close my eyes when i watch a really scary movie. I hate to watch an emotional movie because it disturbs me. I am a liar, sometimes. Mostly, I try to be honest. I have very few good things in me. I want to be a simple man. I want to have sex with women of all race. I want to be loyal to my wife, if i ever marry. I want to get un-drunk. I love chocolates. I love my hometown and I want to live there through out my life. I want to be someones best friend. I want to sleep peacefully. I want to make someone happy. I love to see many of my friends sad. 

Oops. I am drunk. 

I know I will regret this post when i wake up tomorrow. 

But as my policy goes, I never edit my post. So let it be. May be, this is what i really am.

::

faded lights and some smoke

::

The more I type, the more backspaces i hit. Its easier in the silicon space, where i put down things in a text area with the help of a cursor and a keyboard. If only things were this easier. If only backspaces got integrated with real life. If only fading the lights and breathing out thin films of white smoke backspaces things.

I know it doesnt. But nothing else does either.Nothing else, can i do better.

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Memories

::

I would love to erase my memories.
Even then, i might not be able to start over.

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Unanswered questions.

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do u think you will be happy if you get answers to all your questions?


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Sick.

::

Why do I have this feeling that i am getting sick of my own blog?

::

Withdrawal symptoms.

::

Ions. Lots of them. travels through them neurons, creating the illusion of ecstasy, pleasure, pain, and the ultimate orgasm. Ultimately, you can feel good even when someone close to you die. Just that, the ions have to go in a different way to some other place in your funny brain. And you can feel bad for no reason, you can laugh when you are homeless. Just, re route the ions!!

Well, then, it would be possible to do nothing and feel good, you can feel good when lonely, you cannot feel the pain when you starve, and you dont need someone to love you. 

I just need to rip open the brain, re wire the neuron mesh, and feel good doing nothing. 

And when someone feels happy without doing noting, we stamp them lunatic, and treat them. 

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Martini Without Ice.

::

Bangalore gave me one of the worst throat infections i ever had, but that will not, at any cost hold me from having a sip at Purple Haze, when I am at Bangalore. The music has been getting pathetic these days, or may be, new DJs have joined in, whose taste of music doesnt exactly match with mine. But then, today was fine, the good ol guy who enjoy my kind of music was playing something I liked.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rMV-fenGP1g

Refreshing. Its been a long time I heard Van Halen, and not many times have I seen this video.  I asked for a Martini extra dry, stirred, without ice, and that was great.

Right now, you better watch the video.

If it doesnt make any sense to you, nothing will probably.
(Or you can try watching it with a Martini)
::