Tuesday, May 05, 2009

That stray thought again.

Yes, I am accused by my friends (mostly by my female friends) that I think and write only about sex. I cant get the logic. I have written more than 250 posts, maintains separate blogs on music, art and astronomy. Sex has been the main topic of post only less than 10 times, including this one. That is not even 5%.!!

Well, the accusations wont stop me writing anyway.

For some reasons, sex, or the thoughts of sex have dominated some part of my life. Guess, that will be the case with everyone, at some point of life. There has, sure been an evolution in the way I see things, from the very first time i played with myself to the time now. When I look back, I can feel the change, owing to the many incidents that happened from my childhood, through my teenage, to what I am now.

I remember the first time I watched porn. I remember the curiosity to see the female genital, and I remember the curiosity on that thing called intercourse. There was no PC available then (forget internet!!), there were no good material. Only things available was the local literature, and some black and white, unclear pics that some guys used to bring to school, and made us pay some where around 50 paise for a glance. Well - that was in the early 90's. The only education I got about the topic, was from the letters to the doctor, which used to feature in magazines. Well, that educated me quite well, and I am happy I was not mislead during my early pre teens.

Then came the society, and the ethics. These things (read porn) were labelled bad, obscene, vulgar, and every derogatory word that could be used. I couldnot find the point. I still cant, for that matter.

I remember the desperation to see a female body in my pre teens. May be that was when I was a 10 year old. Watching porn, did reduce the curiosity to a comfortable level. The frustrations of teenage has given way to manageable and controllable feelings by the time I reached college.

Something has made me feel bad, or uncomfortable, at times. The advent of latest technology and mobile phone camera have created a lot of side - issues. There is variety in the internet these days. From the stereotype and conventional porn that used to be available, things have changed to a situation where you get any type of flcks, of your choice. Porn is available matching the fantasies of all people - you can choose in terms of age, race, region, fetishes, type of sex acts, and a lot of combinations that you want. And among that, the one that people loves the most seems to be the real life ones - the hidden cams.

Thats where the mobile cams comes in. Websites are filled with leaked private moments of couples, mostly college going ones. Yes, while its enjoyable to watch them, sometimes it do make me feel bad watching them. We, unfortunately are in the era of transition, and social reforms, in terms of virginity of a women at marriage. Virginity of a man at marriage was never a serious issue, I believe. Pre marital sex happend since man kind has evolved, but it was not documented so extensively as now. Previously, women tried to hide, or tried to forget the physical relationships, and it used to work, in many cases. But its a tough call when it comes to a recorded video clip, which circulates in the net for anyone to see.

Worst, is when the society labels them, as someone who does not deserve to live in this world. Men watch, men spend hours to download, Men put up hidden cams, Men cheat women with their private moments, Men watch with wide open eyes, open the zip in no time and masturbates in no time. And then, its time to call the girl a slut, a whore, abuse her and everything.

There is some part in my mind, that stills look at these girls in a bad way, may be due to the orthodox kerala society that brought me up. But I am happy for some reason that the major part of me dont see them bad. I do feel bad about them, and I am equally disturbed on the fact that privacy is being invaded. It can happen to you, it can happen to me. Times are heading up to a situation when we have to scan for hidden cams in public toilets and dressing rooms at shops. To times that girls have to get used to being shot in the nude at the aforementioned places.

To times when men have to be prepared to marry a non virgin woman. Hard, but not hard as you think it is. all you might need is an attitude adjustment.

That, might be hard.
.





5 comments:

shiva said...

its not that you write a lot about sex but write well about it, so that among the 250 entries you made the ones that stick to people's minds are those or it might be that those people also share your interest for the same.
it seemed to range from a self analysis to an anlysis of todays world.one thing you could have looked at was how the same thing changes when we look at it with a general perspective and when it tends to be highly personal.though long it was an easy read.

Anonymous said...

dat was a nice post...!!!!
happy to kno dat evn though u not a social persn..stil u care abt serious social issues...

survivingbrain said...

@anonymous - how do you know I am not a social person??

:P

Athira Unni said...

gross

survivingbrain said...

hmm.. gross..

Yes, ought to be for you, for you are too young to digest these..

Dont worry, you will grow up in years !!!